雅思写作

（七分范文）Somepeoplebelievethatstudyingat

universityorcollegeisthebestroutetoasuccessful

career，whileothersbelievethatitisbettertogeta

jobstraightafterschool.

Discussbothviewsandgiveyouropinion.

Whentheyfinishschool，teenagersfacethedilemmathat

therearesomebenefitstogettingajobstraightafter

school，Iwouldarguethatitisbettertogotocollege

oruniversity.

Theoptiontostartworkstraightafterschoolis

ungpeoplewantto

way，they

canbecomeindependent，andtheywillbeabletoafford

softheircareer，

youngpeoplewhodecidetofindwork，ratherthancontinue

theirstudies，llhave

thechancetogainrealexperienceandlearnpractical

ylead

topromotionsandasuccessfulcareer.

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Ontheotherhand，Ibelievethatitismorebeneficial

y，academic

example，itisimpossibletobecomeadoctor，teacher

ult，

universitygraduateshaveaccesstomoreandbetterjob

opportunities，andtheytendtoearnhighersalariesthan

ly，thejobmarket

isbecomingincreasinglycompetitive，andsometimesthere

arehundredsofapplicantsforonepositioninacompany.

Youngpeoplewhodonothavequalificationsfroma

universityorcollegewillnotbeabletocompete.

Forthereasonsmentionedabove，itemstomethat

studentsaremorelikelytobesuccessfulintheircareers

iftheycontinuetheirstudiesbeyondschoollevel.

以上就是这篇雅思写作7分范文的全部内容，字数足够。这

篇雅思写作范文所占的观点是应该在大学继续学习，但是对另外

的观点也做了相应的论述，所用的篇章结构的语法结构都值得大

家借鉴。

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Band5

Somepeoplethinkthatuniversitiesshould

providegraduateswiththeknowledgeand

think

thatthetruefunctionofauniversityshould

betogiveaccesstoknowledgeforitsown

sake,regardlessofwhetherthecouris

,inyour

opinion,shouldbethemainfunctionofa

university?

Whatknowledgeandskillsshould

universitiesprovidehasbeenarguedfor

oplethinkthatthe

truefunctionofuniversitiesprovide

knowledgefortheirownpurpo,but

nowadays,moreandmorepeoplepointout

thatuniversitiesshouldprovidegraduates

withtheknowledgeandskillsaccordingto

theworkplace.

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Thefirstreasonforuniversitiesshould

providetheknowledgeandskillisthe

students’sly,themostofthe

studentsgotouniversitypurpoofistoget

someknowledgeandskillswhichcould

universitydoesnotprovidetheknowledge

andskills,thestudentsmightnotgetajob

result,theuniversitywouldloitsstudents.

Moreover,providingknowledgeandskills

neededintheworkplacemakesauniversity

skillsandinformation

alwaysareinitiatedintheworkplace,so

focusingontheneedsoftheworkplacethe

universitycouldgetsoundstrategiestodo

rearchandmakeitmoremodernization.

Lastly,providingtheknowledgeandskills

couldbenefitourcountrywhichusually

givesafinancialsupporttouniversities.

Havingtheknowledgeandskills,students

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aremoreeasytogetajob,andthiscan

makeourcountries’economystrong.

Inconclusion,itcanbesaidthatproviding

theknowledgeandskillswhichthe

workplaceneedsiveryuniversity’sbasic

function.

只能拿到5分的原因：

一、这个题目中有两方的观点：some及

others的，很明显这位考生在后面的论证过

程中完全忽视了others的观点,都在一味地

论证some的观点的正确性，于是考官给出

的评语是：itdoesnotaddressallpartsof

thequestion.

写作建议NO.3：Donotneglectanypart,or

youwillregretyourmark.

不要忽视任何东西，否则你的分数会让你很

伤心。

二、这位考生在连接词和复杂句型上都表现

得不错，可是他太偷懒了，knowledgeand

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6

skill这个词组一共用了9次，这种高频率的

repetition让这位考生付出了比较惨重的代

价，所以看者希望你们能够汲取这样的教

训，多注意Paraphra的练习。尤其是常

考的考试主题所可能涉及到的高频单词更

是要做好dgeandskill就

属于top3的高频考题的教育类，所以这类

的词汇一定是多多准备才对，如experti,

conversance,instruction,competence,

aptitude,technique,prowess,dexterity都

可以拿来替换这两个词。

写作建议NO.4：Paraphrahelpsyou

parachuteintoahigherband.

改写能助你拿到高分。

Band6

Somepeoplethinkthatanof

competitioninchildrenshouldbe

believethatchildren

whoaretaughttoco-operateratherthan

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7

s

boththeviewsandgiveyourownopinion.

Nowadays,purpoofeducationbeing

resomepeople

whothinkthatcompetitioninchildren

shouldbemade,alsoothersbelievethat

childrenwhoaretaughttoco-operateas

areadvantagesanddisadvantagesforboth

ofthearguments.

Tobeginwith,whatisgoodifanof

competitioninchildrenismade?They

coulddevelopthemlvesmoreandmoreas

theylearnandstudyalottowinfromthe

ethis,inKorea,itis

popular-evencommonnow-tohaveatutor

whocometostudent’shoutoteachextra

piecesofstudywithpayingalotofmoney.

Theylearnfasterthanwhattheylearnat

rmore,duringthevocations,

studentsstudyabroadtolearnEnglishfora

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8

haveexperimentssuchasstudyabroad,itis

oneofthegreatestpluspointtogotothe

er,

therearefourbigschoolexamandtwo

nationalexaminationstoteststudents’level

lly,onlythehighest40%

cangotothegoodqualityhighschoolsand

collegeschildrenlearnasmuchastheycan,

towinthecompetitiontoobtaingood

qualityschools.

Ontheotherhand,astheyarebusytoenter

theschoolsandstudyindividuallywith

theirowntutors,

comecarelessand

don’thelpothersalotifitisaboutstudies.

Therewillbenoco-operationsforthem.

Then,whyaretherecompaniesformany

peopletoworkin?eachofthemareclever,

however,thereareweakpartsandstrong

-operateisto

talkandlistento

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couldalsobeagreatopportunitytolearn

insteadoflearningalonewithoneteacher.

Inconclusion,Istronglyagreewiththat

childrenshouldbetaughttoco-operate

isperfect.

Peoplelearntogether,worktogetherto

ore,Iwant

parentsandteacherstoeducatechildren

concentratingonco-operation,notcompete

andrankingthem.

问题分析：

从论证大主题的角度来说，这一篇的最后的

收尾是co-operation更重要的成立的，但是

这位考生在文字数量分配上缺乏规划，分配

给competition的文字明显多于给

co-operation的，这样就给了考官一个非常

合情合理的借口扣分，实在是遗憾啊!

写作建议NO.5：Ifitisyourpreference,give

itmorereference.

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如果你更认同那个观点，那就在这个观点上

多写点吧。

如果我们进一步看下Body段里的细节内

容，其实这位考生的语法功力和逻辑论证能

力比上面那位5分同学还要差，但是这篇文

章把题目中的两个方面都提到，没有犯我的

NO.3建议中的错误。除此之外，文字总量

上这一篇文章叫上两篇都有绝对的优势，所

以再强调下数量真的也很重要。

写作建议NO.6：Aquantitativechange

causaqualitativechange.

量变带来质变。

Somepeoplesaythatthegovernmentshouldnot

putmoneyonbuildingtheatresandsportsstadiums.

Theyshouldspendmoremoneyonmedicalcareand

education.

Doyouagreeordisagree?

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Muchdiscussionconcerningallocationofresources

assumesthatthegovernmentshouldspendmoney

onmedicineandeducationratherthanontheatres

inion,thisissue

shouldbeexaminedfromtheangleofwhetherthe

investmentbenefitsthegreatmajorityofthe

population.

Theinstitutionsofmedicalcareandeducation,

undoubtedly,shouldreceivepriorityinthe

allocationofagovernment’xpenditures,atthe

thoughtofmillionsofchildrenfromdeprived

backgroundswhonowgetasubstandardeducation,

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andwhowouldrequirearelativelyhighqualityof

educationiftheyaretoenjoyanythingapproaching

r

pressingneedofsocietyisimprovementofmedical

carefortheadultpoor,fortheaged,andsoforth

downthelist.

Theatresandsportsstadiumsareinstitutionsfor

ssfultheatrical

eventisanexcitingandstimulatingexperience,

whetheritoccursinagrandtheatreorahighschool

torsaswellasthoinvolvedin

stadiums,ontheotherhand,attractmillionsof

spectatorstowatchprofessionalsplayeveryyear.

Manymoremillionswatchgamesontelevision,

readabouttheminnewspapers,anddiscussthem

ore,canwesaythatthe

areunnecessarypublicexpendituresthe

governmentshouldignore?

Inconclusion,todaymanisbecomingevermore

neand

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educationareneedsthatwerecognize,butare

contactswiththeatricalorsportventsalsobasic

needs?(250words)

Somepeoplebelievethatstudentswhowantto

gotouniversityaftergraduationfromhighschool

shouldhaveaboutoneyear’stimetogetajobto

obtainworkexperienceorhaveatraveltoenlarge

theirvision.

Doyouagreeordisagree?Whatisyouropinion?

Highschoolstudentswhointendtostudyat

universityshouldattendtertiaryeducationafter

doneyear’stimedoingajobto

acquireworkexperienceortotravelforbroadening

one’svisionis,tomymind,awasteoftimeand

energy.

First,universityeducationisthecontinuationof

highschooleducationforthostudentswhowant

topursuetheirlearningatanadvancedlevel.A

breakofoneyearfromacademicstudywill

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probablyweakenone’smemoryofwhathasbeen

learned,especiallyforthowhowillstudysuch

theoreticalsubjectsasmathematics,physicsor

chemistry.

Besides,manynationshaveestablishedone

examinationthatallstudentsmustpasstoqualify

mple,inChina

whofailsintheexaminationwillbedeniedof

admissionintoauniversity.

Furthermore,oneyear’sworkortraveldoesnot

helpstudentsmuchintheiracademicstudiesat

universitybecauitisunpredictableforone’swork

experiencetobeintegratedintoone’sstudiesof

specificsubjects,tosaynothingoftraveling

somesubjects,suchasMBA,

requirestudentstohaveworkexperience,one

year’sworkexperience,however,isnotsufficient

tomeettherequirementsofthreeorfiveyears,and

one’sworkexperienceshould,afterall,berelated

tomanagement.

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Toconclude,Iwouldrathersuggestthat

university’scurriculumallowtheintegrationof

academicstudywithpracticaltrainingforthe

compensationforstudents’lackofwork

experience.(250words)

Itissuggestedthatalltheyoungadults

shouldundertakeaperiodofunpaidwork

bringmorebenefitsordrawbackstothe

communityandtheyoungpeople?

范文：

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Inmodernsocieties,itisincreasingly

popularthatyoungpeoplevolunteeron

weekendsinthelocalcommunityrvice

he

youngstersdoitinaregularway,thebenefits

areobvioustoboththecommunityandthe

youngadultsalthoughtherearesomeminor

drawbacksaswell.

Itcanbearguedthattheadvantagesof

doingunpaidcommunityrviceare

,whenanoldpersonfeels

sick,thevolunteerscouldofferfirstaidbefore

,

ifadisabledpersonhasdifficultydoingsome

dailyactivitiessuchasshopping,the

assistancefromyoungvolunteersis

er,asfarastheyoung

peopleareconcerned,theycoulddevelopthe

nofresponsibility,independenceaswell

asinterpersonalskillsintheprocessof

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way,peoplemayliveinharmonyinthe

community.

Nevertheless,thedownsidesofvolunteer

fact,inthecitylikeShanghai,anincreasing

numberofgraduatesfindithardertomakea

,ifalloftheyoung

adultsarerequiredtodofull-timeunpaidjob

inafixedperiod,someofthemwouldhaveno

incomesource,whichisunrealistictothe

tion,itisbelievedthat

communityrvicecouldpossiblytakeup

theirtimeofacquiringknowledge.

Therefore,comparedwiththemeritsof

volunteercommunityrviceofferedbythe

youngadults,thedemeritsofthatarejusta

fewbutcannotbeoverlooked.